Life Imperfect

When the doorbell rang, two-year-old Natalie looked up from the doll she was playing with, her vivid blue eyes questioning. I loved her eyes. They looked just like Trevor’s, my deceased first husband. That was one feature that had drawn me to him right away, and though our marriage had ended violently, it was only due to that union that I had my daughter.

“Who could that be?” I asked with a smile.

She tossed her doll aside and scurried to the front door, then waited for me to open it.

Just as eager as Natalie, I hurried to the door and pulled it open. “Alyssa,” I said with a smile, then pulled her into a hug. “It’s so good to see you.”

“You too,” she said as she wrapped her arms around my shoulders. “It’s been too long.”

I released her and invited her in.

She stepped into the entry, then knelt in front of Natalie. “Hello, beautiful girl. Do you remember me?”

“Of course she does,” I said, my voice joyful. “We’ve been looking at pictures from your last visit.” I ran my fingers through Natalie’s soft baby hair. “Do you remember Aunt Alyssa?”

Natalie looked at Alyssa shyly, then nodded.

“She is so adorable,” Alyssa said as she stood.

“Thanks.”

“Is Jackson asleep?”

“Yes, but he’s due to wake up any minute.”

“Good. I can’t wait to hold him.”

“I was just about to have a late lunch,” I said as I walked towards the kitchen. “Are you hungry after that long drive?”

“Actually, I kind of am.”

I pulled out some lunch meat and bread and began making sandwiches. “How was the drive from Vegas?”

She leaned against the counter. “I left pretty early this morning, but the drive wasn’t too bad.”

“That’s good.” I glanced at her. “I need to get out there and see Trevor’s parents. They haven’t seen Jackson since he was born, and he’s five months old.”

Alyssa was quiet for a few moments. “I really admire how you’ve kept Trevor’s parents in your life, Lily. I don’t know if I could have done that. You know, after everything that happened with Trevor.”

Glancing at her again, I said, “I want Natalie to know her grandparents. Especially since mine are no longer around.” I smiled. “The more people who love her, the better.”

“Yeah. That totally makes sense.”

I carried the plates to the table and set them on the placemats, then turned to Alyssa. “How’s Ty?”

She smiled, but it seemed to falter. “He’s good.”

I wondered what she wasn’t telling me about her husband, but knew if she wanted to share whatever was troubling her, she’d tell me in time. I gestured for her to sit, then made sure Natalie was content with her doll before I sat as well. “What about your job? How’s that going?”

“It’s been busy. Las Vegas is a good place for those of us in the hospitality field. I’m glad I moved there.”

“I’ll bet. I’m just glad you were able to take a few days off for a visit.”

She picked up her sandwich. “Me too. But I’ll have to head back on Friday.”

“Well, that gives us a couple of days to visit.” At that moment I heard the unmistakable sound of Jackson waking up from his nap. Letting him fuss for a few minutes, I managed to eat half of my sandwich before pushing back from the table. “Motherhood calls,” I said.

Alyssa laughed as I headed towards the hallway. 

Pausing outside Jackson’s door, I listened to his baby sounds before pushing the door open and walking to his crib. “Hi there, baby,” I cooed. “We have a visitor today.”

Jackson kicked his feet and smiled as I reached down and lifted him from the crib. I changed him, then carried him into the kitchen.

Alyssa held out her hands. “Oh my goodness. He is so cute. He’s looking more and more like Marcus.”

I set him in her arms. “Yes, he is definitely a mini-Marcus.”

After only a moment, Jackson’s chin quivered, then he began to wail. Alyssa looked stricken as she held him out to me.

I laughed. “He’s just hungry.” I walked to the couch and sat on the soft cushions. “You don’t mind if I nurse him, do you?”

“Of course not.”

I got Jackson settled and a few moments later Alyssa joined me on the couch in the family room.

“You’re such a good mother, Lily.”

Warmed by her kind words, I smiled. “Just as you will be one day.”

She gazed at me, then her eyes filled with tears.

Horrified that I may have said something that had upset her, my face paled. “What’s wrong?”

“Oh, Lily,” she said as she took a tissue out of her purse and dabbed at her eyes. “Everything’s wrong.”

“What is it? What’s going on?”

She shook her head as she stared at her lap, then she finally met my gaze. “It’s Ty.”

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